Angie IV

Angie IV
By: Mia L. Hazlett
11/9/14

The other day I was at ball and twisted my ankle. I really didn’t think about it until practice last night. I stepped on it wrong or somethin’.

My mother is picking me up today. I have to go to the doctors to get my ankle checked out. Aww damn. I see the car ahead of us by a few, it’s Angie’s mom. I forgot Angie’s final period is over here today. Uh-oh, she’s getting out of her car. She opens the back door and takes her coat off. As she puts it on a hanger, she glances back and then stops. She’s walking towards us.

“Hey isn’t that your friend’s mother? What’s her name? Angela?” my mother rolls her window down as Angie’s mom smiles outside the car.

“Hi,” she offers her hand so my mom can shake it, “I’m Calise, Angela’s mother. We’ve met before.”

“Oh yes, I remember. It was at one of the dances. Right?” my mother asks and shakes her hand.

“Would you mind stepping out of the car so we can have a conversation?” Angie’s mother asks.

“Um,” my mother hesitates, but gets out.

I really can’t hear what they’re sayin’, but I’m pretty sure it’s about me. They keep looking back at me.

“I don’t know what you’re little hoochie daughter is telling you, but my son is a basketball player and doesn’t have time for little girls. You’re mistaken,” my mother shouts and gets back into the car.

“Ask him. He’s right there,” she points at me and gives me a death glare.

“You need to go back to your car. Get away from us,” my mother shouts as the window glides up. I slink down in the seat, hoping no one can see me.

Angie’s mother hits the window with her hand, “Go fuck yourself.” she says before walking to her car.

“Yo mom, that chick is crazy,” I say right before my mother’s hand slaps me across the face.

“Shut up. Just shut up Christopher. Don’t say a word to me. I am so disappointed in you right now.”

Copyright © 2014, Mia L. Hazlett

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Monster XVIII

Monster XVIII
By: Mia L. Hazlett
11/11/14

I wondered what the sound was. Although I had never seen a waterfall, if asked to describe what I was hearing, I would answer, a waterfall. And then, the sound faded. Somehow with the absence of sound, my box brightened. I heard a machine of some sort. Maybe a drill. Maybe my death. But, whatever it was, it brought light.

With silence – no waterfall, no drill, no death – I looked to my right. I was still confined to my wooden space with my three dead survivalists. When I looked through the 3-inch drilled hole, I realized I was not buried. I was in the room where we made Cake Leftovers. I was on top of the same table. I don’t know if water has a smell, but it smelled wet. This entire time I thought they had buried me out in the wilderness, never to be found again. Instead, I was in a box and left to my own psychological torture.

Not knowing where I was, was better than knowing who I was with. I guess being buried in the woods, I would have starved to death. I completely assumed – no eating, no drinking –would lead to my death. Maybe all their hearts had to offer was a quick painful death of my now dead foes. I should have become cake leftovers. Instead, I saw three bodies getting closer. They stood in front of the hole blocking the light.

I waited. There was an eye. I stared at revenge. The eye receded, replaced by the tip of a knife.

“My turn,” I heard Footsteps say. No death for me. Just a terrifying existence.

Copyright © 2014 Mia L. Hazlett

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Angie III

Angie III
By: Mia L. Hazlett
11/8/2014

“Shit dawg. Watchu gonna do?” my boy Rese asks as we get ready for basketball practice.

“Rese, I don’t even know. Angie is cool and all, but I don’t want no damn baby with her. And she wants to keep it.
Like I seriously think she thinks we are going to get married and like have this kid,” I say and lace up my Jordans.

“She wants to get married? Yo, dude, you gotta cut her. Get out now and let her and that kid go. Watchu gonna do with a baby anyways? You’re friggin’ sixteen. You gonna be playin’ college ball soon. Don’t call her no more, nuthin’.”

“You think I need you to tell me that? Man I ain’t callin’ no one.”

My phone had like twenty text messages. Luckily she only comes to the high school for two of her classes. She gets high school credit for some classes. Otherwise, she spends all her time in the junior high across the street. My mom and dad don’t know nothin’. They’ll freak. But I’m not sayin’ nothin’. I got a good chance at gettin’ a full scholarship for ball. If this chick thinks I’m givin’ all that up she’s crazy. I ain’t givin’ ball up for no one.

It’s kinda messed up what I’m doin’, but I don’t care. My mother’s father was never around. She always told me if I ever got a girl pregnant, I better stay there for that girl and that child. But my mom is that old school stuff. Don’t nobody get married anymore when they have kids. Even if it gets back to my moms, I’ll just deny it. They won’t be able to prove a damn thing. I mean, I already told Angie I didn’t want no damn kid. If she has it, she’s havin’ it against my will. That’s gotta be breakin’ the law or somethin’. Even if it ain’t, me and Angie are done.
Copyright © 2014 Mia L. Hazlett

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Angie II

Angie II
By: Mia L. Hazlett
11/4/14

I wake up and am mushed between the wall and my mother. I remember telling her everything. I cried to her about Chris not calling me. If anything, I can’t believe how lucky I really am. My mother didn’t yell at me. She didn’t shame me. She just held me and let me talk. She let me be scared. She let me hate Chris. But most importantly, she promised for the next week, we don’t have to tell my father.

Standing in front of my mirror the next morning, I turn to the side and look at my stomach. It’s still flat. I don’t know for how long, but I know ugly is coming soon. I saw this freshman girl at school one time and her stomach looked like someone had drawn little squiggly lines all over it and a giant one down the middle. If I get fat and ugly, Chris will never want me.

My mother told me we would handle him later, but the most important thing was a doctor’s appointment. She made one for today and she will pick me up after school. I can’t believe how cool my mom is being. I know she won’t last like this for long. Once she tells my dad, it will be over for me. But I need my mom right now. I felt really safe when I woke up with her in my bed. She told my dad I was sick and she wanted to stay close to me.

This cannot be happening. I look at the pick-up ring, which is where parents pull in to pick their kids up from school, and my mom and Chris’s mom are shouting at each other. Chris is in the passenger’s seat, slinking down trying not to be seen. I walk closer and hear my mother say “go fuck yourself,” before walking to the car and slamming the door.

I get in the car and I’m so embarrassed. I don’t say anything. I’m too scared. My mother just cussed my boyfriend’s mother out.

“Honey, I want you to know something. What you and Chris have done, is totally irresponsible. But both of you did it. Both of you. And people are going to say a lot of things because you’re young. But nobody gets to put you down and not hear my mouth. Now don’t get me wrong Angela, we are not friends. I am your mother and when I tell your father, the shit is gonna hit the fan. But baby, I will go to war and back for you. You are my God-given responsibility and I will protect you with my life. Now put your seat belt on.”

We drive off and I love and fear my mother at the same time.

Copyright © 2014 Mia L. Hazlett

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In My Head VIII

In My Head VIII
By: Mia L. Hazlett
11/4/2014

Oh no.  It was almost time for Daddy to pick us up.  I didn’t want to go with him, but Mommy said it was only for tonight and she would come get us tomorrow.  She said it’s Christmas and it’s good to spend time with family.  I don’t want to be with Daddy.  He has a new family.  People can’t have a new family and an old family.

My friend,Tisha, said she never sees her dad now that he has a new family and a little baby brother.  She’s never even met her baby brother.  She didn’t even think he was a baby anymore.  Her mom and my mom are friends.  They are supposed to come over soon, but I will probably be with my stupid dad.

All of my cousins and aunts and uncles are here.  I came up to my room so I could pack my clothes.  My sister stood in her room looking out the window.  She already had her coat and hat on.  Mommy told her to take them off or she would be cold when she went outside, but she never listens.

I went back downstairs and started playing UNO with my cousins and uncle. My sister came into the living room like an hour later and she was crying.  Mommy was right behind her telling her it would be okay.  I could tell by what Mommy was saying, Daddy wasn’t coming.  She always tried to cheer us up and tell us we could go out for breakfast in the morning.  My sister would not hear it.  I bet she didn’t even want Daddy, she just wanted her presents.

I was happy.  I had just won three games of UNO and now I didn’t have to go see Daddy and his dumb family.  If he didn’t want to see us, I didn’t want to see him.  I felt bad for my sister.  She didn’t understand.  She was just a little baby.  She didn’t understand Daddy had a new family now.  Maybe his new family is like Tisha’s dad’s new family.  Maybe my dad has new kids.  Dads don’t need old kids when they have new kids.

Copyright © 2014  Mia L. Hazlett

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Filed under children, daughters, divorce, family, fiction, In My Head, motherhood, parents, sisterhood

Angie

Angie
By Mia L. Hazlett
11/3/2014

This sucks. My life is over at fourteen. I’m gonna die. I’m so alone. I can’t talk to anyone. I lie on my bed holding my cell praying for him to call. He promised he would call. A quick vibration and “BFF” pops up on my iPhone along with a picture of Shayna.

“Girl,” I say, “He hasn’t called me. He came up to my locker after 4th and he said he was gonna call me after ball. I dun text him like ten damn times. Can’t nobody tell nobody they don’t have no time to text back. “

“Watchu doin’ now? Let’s roll down to his practice,” Shayna puts an idea in my head.

“I just gotta wait for my parents to get here, ‘cause I’m watchin’ Jordy. He gonna be outta practice by the time they get home,” I get the idea out of my head to roll up on him at his basketball practice.

“Well if he ain’t called by the time they get home, we gonna go knockin’ on his front door. He ain’t gettin’ outta this girl. If he thinks he is, the brotha dun lost his damn mind. He’s gotta know he can’t avoid us,” Shayna has always had my back.

“Girl what am I going to do?” I got my boyfriend out of my head and now it is just BFF to BFF.

“Whatever you do, don’t tell your parents. First you gotta see what Chris is gonna say, because you know your Daddy is gonna flip,” Shayna reminds me what else I am scared of.

“What if they kick me out? I mean they don’t even know I have a boyfriend. Shayna I’m so scared.” My voice cracks and the tears follow.

“Girl don’t cry. It’s gonna be okay. They ain’t gonna kick you out. And even if they do, you can come over here. You know my mother would never let you be on the streets.”

Somehow, every time Shayna tells me not to cry, I cry harder. The downstairs door opens. My mother is home. Maybe there is time to catch him at practice.

“Girl I have to go set the table for dinner. My mom just got home.”

I hang up with Shayna and go to the bathroom to wash my face. If I don’t wash my face and get my puffy eyes to go away, I will end up telling my mother. The one thing I’ve always been able to do is talk to my mom. If my mother asks me anything, I’ll lose it and tell her. She can’t know yet.

I throw the cold water on my face and I’m not sure if it is the water on my face or me bending over, but whatever happened, I now stand over the toilet throwing up. Back to the sink. Too late. My mother is behind me rubbing my back as I rinse my mouth out.

I turn and face my mother, “What’s going on babygirl?” she asks.

“Mummee, I’m pregnant,” I crumble into tears in my mother’s arms.

She holds me tight to her chest and whispers into my ear, “I know baby. I already know.”

Copyright © 2014 Mia L. Hazlett

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Monster XVII

Monster XVII
By: Mia L. Hazlett
10/11/14

I hoped the three rats were the only ones. My life or theirs. After squishing one between my foot and the bottom of this miserable coffin, I squeezed two to death in my hands. I wasn’t sure if I was becoming a heartless killer or if the instinct of survival prevailed. Either way, I was alive and they were dead. I would never be Footsteps, so I convinced myself it was survival.

Obviously, I had failed at my attempted murder. Or had I? Maybe Footsteps was dead and Maniacal had tracked me with the Doctor. It didn’t matter. I was stuck underground with dead rats. I didn’t remember what happened from the car to a rat biting my foot. I knew I had a scalpel and tried to cut Footstep’s neck. Maybe I was becoming a heartless killer. Slicing a person’s neck had to fall somewhere in the heartless category. But he was my kidnapper, so I was going to keep myself in the survivalist category.

The real question, how long had I been here? Eventually I would run out of oxygen. Had they put me through all of this just to bury me alive with rats? Months, maybe a year of torture, just to become cake leftovers? Knowing how long I had been here didn’t matter, I didn’t feel suffocated. My breathing came easy. That was more worrisome. Maybe they were keeping me alive to face the consequences. I could handle myself with the rats. They were just looking to survive like me. Survivalist against survivalist. But if they were keeping me alive to go against Footsteps, if he was still alive, that was much different. It wasn’t about heartless killer against survivalist. It was about a heartless killer seeking revenge. I should have let the rats eat me alive. No one survived revenge.

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